It's not too surprisingly really that the most embarrassing moments of your life happen when you least expect them. It's also probably not too surprising either that these are the stories of one's misspent youth that makes a person laugh in hindsight. I was fourteen at the time and dressed up to the nines and thought I was "as smart as a rat with a gold tooth" as my Uncle Jock used to say.
My Grandmother always said "pride cometh before a fall" and they were both right as usual. I was off to the pictures on a sunny Saturday afternoon and I was going to meet my boyfriend outside the theatre because I wasn't supposed to be 'dating' any boy. Back in those days (early-mid 60's) here in Australia we still called the movies the pictures. They were always called that until the advent of a lot of TV programs from America came in on our TV's and slowly "the pictures" has slowly disappeared from our language. However, that's another story.
I met up with my girlfriend and she dutifully admired my attire. We were both as excited as two hens on the one nest and weren't paying too much attention between giggles and shared hopes as to where we were walking. I wasn't very experienced at that time with wearing high heels and even though by most standards they wouldn't be considered 'high' they were much higher than a bare foot kid from the country was used to balancing on. We were about to cross the street to the picture theatre when disaster struck.
My friend pointed my boyfriend out waiting for me in front of the picture theatre and he saw us about the same time and waved. I waved back just as I stepped off the footpath onto the road and stepped on the side of a pot-hole in the bitumen and down I went, landing like a cat on all fours.
I heard this terrific rip and felt my knee go straight through my nylon stocking, my handbag went flying out in front of me onto the road and my beautiful yellow frock was smeared with black bitumen stains! My boyfriend hurried over and helped me up just as another girl walked by with her friend and noticed who I was meeting there and said sarcastically "You have really fallen for him, haven't you?" and the pair of them giggled all the way across the street. I was too mortified and embarrassed to even feel the hurt from my grazed and bleeding knee and my hands stung with gravel rash.
I couldn't go home again and change because there wasn't time and my friend had already bought our tickets. So I went to the ladies and cleaned up as best I could but I felt absolutely miserable and then sore. I never even got to hold hands with him because of the gravel rash on my palms. But when the lights went out he did put his arm around my shoulders (eventually!) and give me a cuddle. The anticipation of "will he- won't he" was adrenalin pumping stuff to a fourteen year old girl who had just taken off her stockings and was recovering from a most embarrassing situation.
Stocking Shopping
